How many chances should a cheating spouse get?
Alisha qυеѕtіοחеԁ:
Mу spouse аחԁ I һаνе bееח through a lot іח ουr 20+ years οf marriage. I recently found out һе һаѕ bееח cheating οח mе again. I һаνе tried talking tο һіm аחԁ giving һіm tһе chance tο come сƖеаח, bυt һе won’t take іt. I don’t know һοw much longer I саח take tһе stress.
ZERO probability.
We teach people how to treat us.
“Again” is the key word in your inquiry. He did it once, then he did it again. Unless there are serious penalty, he has no reason not to do it yet again. It all depends on how much you can place up with.
If he refuses to come clean, it is since he refuses to change. Cheating is in his blood. And he will not change. The longer you accept this, the harder it will be for you to live with it. The stress will distroy you. Dump him. With permission.
once is more than enough for me…
once. i MAY be able to go pass one time, but not two. if he’s cheating twice, he just doesnt care..enough. i would end it and not waste another 20 years of my life on a liar..and not risk STDs.
You will take the stress until it either kills you, or you finally choose that living without him and his cheating ways is far more appealing than living with him and his cheating ways.
Twenty years is a long time, and harder to end a marriage that is terrible, but if he consistently cheats, then why stay married to him? Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. Its time to get out. He doesn’t even feel terrible. He will cheat again. Do you want to stay for the third time?
Cheating has nothing to do with you, but everything to do with him. I can’t tell you to leave him but I can offer an ancient saying: fool me once same on you fool me twice same on me.
Cheating on you….again? Once bitten twice shy, baby. Say goodbye and hope the door hit’s him in the *(&%($*& on the way out. I don’t mean to be blunt or rude, but once a cheater, always a cheater (so the saying goes), and your hubby has proven it. I know you are torn since of the time invested in your marriage, but if you stay with him, you are in the end telling him that his events and behavior are ok and conventional. Is that the thought you want to send to him, to your family (high and mighty you have them)? I know you are stronger than that and deserve much better.
once is understandable (given stress and things like that) but thats it…the second i heard he did it again, he would have been out!
u have to question physically do u want to hurt just once or do u want years more of this hurt. its like a lottery u take it once or do u want to take it in several increments. myself i would forgive only once, after that its useless since when there aren’t any penalty they tend to do it over and over again. unless he is willing to admit and show regret i would kick him to the curb.
Okay you can only take as much as you allow physically to take. Do not allow your spouse to make you feel stressed out. I would say if 20 years wasn’t excellent enough for him with the woman he married then he is just a DOG and doesn’t deserve you!! After 20 years if he is still chaeting you just might have on eof those cases…ONCE A CHEATER, ALWAYS A CHEATER!! You will feel a lot better if you leave him now and not have to deal with a day to day headache of trying to know where he is at…etc..YOu should not need to watch any man!!! GOOD LUCK…SOUNDS LIKE a TRUE LOSER!!
To me a cheating spouse gets no second chance. My relationships are like stud poker. Once out, always out!
The “AGAIN” is the key part, I reckon.
I DO judge that people can make serious makes ONCE, be repentant, and make the choice to never repeat incorrect behavior for the rest of their lives — and that isn’t just cheating.
So the fact that you’re saying you’ve had to deal with this more than once is the deal-breaker.
Excellent luck, Precious.
xoxoxoxo
Once, maybe, if he’s really willing to commit to working through the tribulations that led to the circumstances and make sure it doesn’t happen again. If it does, he’s proven he’s not capable or willing to place in the effort – and if you’re not willing to keep letting him do it, it’s time to let him go.
from the word go, zero probability. you forgave him once now he’s gonna repeat consequential you will forgive him. stop worrying physically sick. look excellent and get a side kick
zero probability….once a cheater, always a cheater.
well, he can be cheating dozens of times and u won’t catch him.. So are you asking how many probability he gets ONLY when he gets caught? I infer that’s what u mean.. ummmm.. he’s a serial cheater… what’s the point of making a huge deal about it, he’s probably been doing it all along.
Some people just can’t resist temptation. It probably has small to do with your marriage, or you…he’s just weak.
For the sake of your sense of self-worth, you should tell him to leave. See a lawyer and get the facts straight, the lawyer will tell you what your rights are, with or without a commitment by you to seeing it through.
Reckon of how fantastic your life could be without him and his snoring, making his meals, touch obligated to keep house clean and tidy for him, catering to his schedule. Go back to school to learn about something you really like, have the frankness to get up when YOU feel like it, Oh, I Could Go On! ha ha. Look at the bright side and don’t go back!
any probability at all! a person who cheats is not respecting you and that means he doesn’t want to share his life with you
You said cheating again? I would have left him after the first time, let alone allow him to continue it.
One. One time is thorough a mistake. Everbody makes mistakes and should be forgiven..but if he keeps on cheating, its intentional and he’s just out to hurt you. He’s not apologetic about what he did or else he would have nipped it in the bud. Don’t place up with it any longer. He sees that you’re willing to take it so of course he’s gonna cheat! “A man can only do what you LET him do”. Life is too small, don’t place physically through that kind of stress. Trust me, there’s a name out there who will treat you better. Excellent Luck!
Honey, you deserve better.
To be honest though, have you talked to him to find out why he cheated in the first place? Maybe, in his small world, you don’t make him feel loved, he has low self-esteem, or you guys argue too much. Fixing what he claims to be the root of his faithlessness seems to be the only solution if you want to stay with him. He could use some fixing himself since he obviously has interaction issues with you.
It could also just be an excuse for him to be a pig and cheat.
Wow, did you get a diamond for every time he gets caught?
Seriously, you must have like him very much. And am high and mighty that he must have other fantastic qualities. And though in my book no other fantastic feature can compensate for infedility, am open-minded enough to accept the possibility of exceptions.
Besides, you cannot change him. Change has to come within him. The only one you can control in a relationship is you. Just be sure that there’s always a condom handy and insist that he visits your doc and gets a clean bill of health.
ounce’s is excellent enough. if you keep on giving him probability each time he cheated well honey he will never stop cheating. i no 20 year is a long time and you invest alot of time and touch but now and again you have to see what is better for you. he is having a excellent time and not thinking about you or your kids(if any) he is not thinking about all the excellent and terrible time the two of you have. he is being selfish and maybe its time for you to also be selfish and reckon about your self.
Zero.
Zilch.
Nada.
He’s parking his car in different garages but he still come home when it’s time for oil change.